The Method of Preserving Essence Through Sexual Restraint: A Traditional Chinese Medicine Perspective on Nourishing Essence by Restraining Sexual Desire

Methods of Abstinence to Preserve Essence

"Desire" refers to sexual desire and lust; "essence" refers to vital essence, specifically yin essence. "Conserving essence through moderation" means restraining sexual desire, preserving vital essence, and consolidating yin essence. In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), the meaning of "essence" is broader, encompassing not only male semen but also the fundamental substances that constitute the human body and maintain its life activities. Human formation begins with essence, takes shape from essence, and relies on the nourishment of yin essence. Therefore, the *Ling Shu* (Spiritual Pivot), in its chapter on meridians, states: "When a person is first born, essence is formed first; when essence is formed, the brain and marrow are produced, bones become the framework, vessels become the nourishment, tendons become strong, flesh becomes the walls, skin becomes firm, and hair grows long." The *Su Wen* (Plain Questions), in its chapter on the Golden Chamber, states: "Essence is the foundation of the body." If yin essence is abundant and well-preserved, the functions of the internal organs are vigorous, and the body is healthy and free from illness. If yin essence is excessively depleted and weakened, the functions of the internal organs decline, leading to weakness, premature aging, and frequent illness.

Abstinence can preserve essence, which is manifested in restraining sexual desire, calming the mind, preserving yin essence internally, and nourishing the body. Firstly, it prevents the cessation of desire to avoid the depletion of yin essence, and secondly, it prevents the arousal of yang to quell the excessive movement of ministerial fire and avoid the unnecessary leakage of yin essence. As the "Three Primal Assistance for Longevity" says: "When one is calm and still, and desire does not arise, the essence and qi are dispersed in the three jiaos, nourishing the hundred meridians; but when desire arises, the lustful fire burns fiercely, causing the essence and qi of the three jiaos to overflow and be discharged from the gate of life, how frightening!" At the same time, preserving essence can also calm the mind, making the spirit vigorous and the body strong and healthy. Zhang Jiebin, a physician of the Ming Dynasty, believed that "desire should not be indulged, for indulgence will deplete the essence, and depletion will dissipate the true essence. For essence generates qi, qi generates spirit, and the body's health is entirely dependent on this. Therefore, those who are good at nourishing life must cherish their essence. When essence is abundant, qi is vigorous; when qi is vigorous, spirit is complete; when spirit is complete, the body is healthy; when the body is healthy, illness is rare; and when spirit and qi are strong, one grows stronger with age-all of this originates from essence." It is evident that moderation in sexual activity to preserve essence is closely related to human health. Those who are good at nourishing life must practice moderation in sexual activity to preserve essence in order to maintain vigorous spirit and good health.

To practice abstinence and conserve essence, the following aspects should be noted:

1. Adopting the mind and spirit

Nourishing the mind and spirit is key to conserving essence through moderation in sexual activity. Only when the mind is at peace and free from distractions can one achieve the goal of controlling desires. The mind houses the spirit and contains the sovereign fire; when the spirit is calm and the mind is at peace, the yin essence is firmly preserved. If the mind and spirit are disturbed by external things, the internal fire of desire will stir, and the sovereign fire will ignite the ministerial fire. When the ministerial fire moves recklessly, it easily leads to the dissipation of yin essence. As Zhu Danxi said, "The kidneys are responsible for storing essence, and the liver is responsible for dispersing it. Both organs have ministerial fire, which is connected to the heart. The heart is the sovereign fire, which is easily agitated by external influences. When the heart agitates, the ministerial fire is easily agitated, and when it agitates, the essence flows away. The ministerial fire rises suddenly, and even without intercourse, it flows and disperses secretly. Therefore, sages only teach people to calm and nourish their hearts, and the meaning is profound." Zhang Jiebin also emphasized the role of calming the mind in restraining desires and preserving essence, pointing out, "Nowadays, people only abstain from sex as if it were for health preservation, but they do not know that there will inevitably be reckless movements. Qi disperses with the mind and does not gather, and essence is lost with the qi. Buddhists who abstain from desires say: It is better to abstain from desires than to abstain from the mind. The mind is the chief minister. If the chief minister is stopped, the followers will all stop. If the evil mind does not stop, what is the benefit of abstaining from desires? This statement deeply grasps the essence of controlling desires and is also an aid to the eight gates!" These statements illustrate that calming the mind, restraining desires, and not being agitated by external things are the prerequisites for preventing the secret depletion of yin essence.

To cultivate a peaceful mind, one should also strengthen moral character and willpower. Based on acquiring knowledge about sex, one should avoid the negative stimulation of pornography and obscene materials, channeling one's energy into study and work, and actively participating in beneficial social activities to enrich leisure time. Only in this way can one eliminate distracting thoughts and achieve mental stability.

2. Marriage at the appropriate age

Ancient physicians consistently advocated for marriage at an appropriate age and opposed early marriage, aiming to maintain a healthy body and conserve essence through moderation in sexual activity. Young people, whose bodies are not yet fully developed and whose self-control is weak, are prone to excessive sexual desire if they marry too early. This can easily lead to uncontrolled ejaculation, damaging their yin essence, or harming the mother and child during pregnancy and childbirth, resulting in illness or premature aging. The *Four Essentials of Nourishing Life, Volume One* states: "In youth, qi is abundant and easily overflows. At this time, with abundant blood and qi, coupled with the desires of young women, desires are easily aroused, leading to excessive sexual activity. Like flowers in a garden, those that bloom early will wither first; how much more so those with weak constitutions!" The *Treatise on Nourishing Life in Taiding, On Children and Adolescents* also states: "Confucius said: 'When people are young, their blood and qi are not yet settled; they should be wary of lust. Ancient methods recommended that men marry at thirty and women at twenty. Furthermore, one should observe the strength of their blood and complexion and adjust accordingly, and examine their inherent nature and adapt accordingly.'" All these statements advocate against early marriage to moderate sexual desire and preserve yin essence. Ancient physicians repeatedly warned of the dangers of early marriage. For example, the book "Shou Shi Bao Yuan" states: "If a man deflowers too early, he will damage his essence and qi; if a woman deflowers too early, she will damage her blood vessels." "If a man has sex with a woman before his essence is fully developed, there will be dissatisfaction in the five parts of his body, and he will suffer from indescribable diseases in the future."

It is generally believed that the optimal age for marriage is closely related to the age for childbearing. In my country, young people typically reach full physical maturity between the ages of 23 and 25, at which time their sperm and egg quality is high, and their fertility is at its peak. Therefore, medical experts generally consider 25-27 years old for men and 23-25 ​​years old for women to be the optimal age for marriage.

3. Practice moderation in sexual desire

Ancient Chinese medicine believed that moderation in sexual activity and avoiding damage from sexual intercourse could prevent disease, improve health, and prolong life. For example, the *Record of Nourishing Nature and Prolonging Life* states: "The difference in lifespan between people is not natural; it is all due to carelessness, poor diet, excessive indulgence, disobedience to yin and yang, loss of spirit and soul, depletion of essence, decline of life, and the onset of various diseases, thus preventing the full lifespan." This illustrates that excessive indulgence in sexual activity is one of the causes of premature aging. Married young adults should exercise restraint in their sexual life and should not rely on their physical strength to indulge in unrestrained sexual activity, thereby depleting their kidney essence. For example, the *Qianjin Yaofang* (Essential Prescriptions Worth a Thousand Gold Pieces) states in its chapter on "Supplementing Sexual Activity": "Those skilled in preserving life, whenever they feel their libido increase, must carefully suppress it, and must not indulge themselves to the point of harming themselves. If one can control it once, the fire is extinguished once, and the oil is added again; if one cannot control it and indulges in unrestrained ejaculation, it is like the oil lamp is about to be extinguished, and the oil is removed. How can one not be deeply cautious? The problem is that people do not know this when they are young, and even if they do know it, they cannot double their efforts. When they realize this in old age, it is already too late, and the illness is difficult to cure." The *Zunsheng Bajian* (Eight Treatises on Following Life) in its chapter on "Gaozi's Three Knowledges for Prolonging Life" clearly discusses the timing and importance of abstinence. The importance of restraint: "Vital energy is finite, but human desires are infinite. Once desire arises, it burns like a raging fire. If one can, at the first stirrings of desire, grit one's teeth and resist the urge, remembering that places of debauchery are like the ruins of tigers and leopards, or the paths of darkness, even if one's body is thrown into claws and teeth, one should think of the iceberg ahead and the abyss about to drown. Even if one thinks of other ways to restrain one's heart, or engages in other activities to avoid the danger, then one can restrain one's mind and thus avoid desire." This means that when desire arises, one should think of the serious consequences of greed and control it in time to prevent the harm of indulgence. For the elderly, they should be even more cautious about sexual desire and should not indulge in what they cannot. Many ancient health experts advocated abstaining from sexual activity after the age of sixty. The *Shou Shi Bao Yuan* (Preserving Life and Health) states, "For the elderly, as their blood and energy weaken, sexual activity tends to increase. They must be cautious and restrain themselves, and not indulge in unrestrained desires." The *Lao Lao Heng Yan* (Constant Words for the Elderly) says, "Abstaining from desire in old age is a natural part of the ebb and flow of life." The hexagram *Sun* (Decrease) in the *Hexagram Sun* (Diminishing Intent) states, "Suppressing desire is the way. If not, it will only become forced, leading to further depletion and ultimately shortening one's lifespan." As people age, the essence of the kidneys gradually diminishes, and sexual desire also gradually declines. Therefore, one should exercise greater restraint in sexual activity. The concept of "abstaining from desire" cannot be generalized. Those with weak constitutions should be cautious; while those with strong constitutions do not need to forcibly suppress it, but should moderate their activity.

There are four advantages to abstaining from sexual desire: First, it improves the quality of sexual life; second, it effectively delays the decline of sexual function; third, it helps maintain vigorous energy and physical strength, avoiding mental fatigue, loss of willpower, and emptiness caused by excessive indulgence, as well as certain diseases; and fourth, it is beneficial for eugenics. As stated in the *Guangsi Jiyao* (Essentials for Promoting Offspring): "One must cultivate and accumulate essence to nourish one's innate nature, reduce desires to prolong life, thus cherishing essence and body, having children and longevity-how wonderful is that!"

4. Sleeping alone to conserve essence

Sleeping alone, also known as sleeping alone or living in separate rooms, is an important method for conserving vital energy after marriage by moderating sexual activity. Ancient physicians considered it an excellent strategy for preserving vital energy. For example, the *Qianjin Yifang* states, "The superior man sleeps in a separate bed, the average man in a separate blanket; a thousand doses of medicine are not as good as sleeping alone." Sleeping alone does not mean abstaining from sexual activity, but rather maintaining a calm mind, avoiding distractions, and refraining from lustful thoughts and desires, thus preserving vital energy. Zhu Danxi, in his *Gezhi Yulun: Seyu Zhen*, admonished people to stay away from the bedroom and moderate their sexual desires, urging them to "cherish each other and preserve their natural harmony." Based on the Five Elements theory, he proposed that couples should sleep separately during April, May, June, October, and November each year to conserve vital energy. He pointed out: "The ancients said that one should not be disturbed by what one desires. With the abundance of gentleness in the body, the allure of sound to the ears, the beauty of color to the eyes, and the fragrance of scent to the nose, who among us, even the most resolute heart, would not be moved? Those skilled in preserving life should spend five months away from home. Even if there is only one month of rest, it is advisable to temporarily step away from the comforts of the home, cherish oneself, and maintain one's natural harmony." For young adults whose desires are easily aroused and difficult to control, and for those with yin deficiency and easily aroused yang fire, living alone in separate rooms is an effective method of maintaining health.